Our finances took a pretty nice-sized hit this year, and I've watched as our savings account keeps moving in the wrong direction. We had to turn down an offer of a free beachfront Florida condo because we needed to work more than we needed to frolic in the sun. We very rarely eat anywhere but at home. We follow our budget to the penny, and there isn't any room for anything extra right now.
Meanwhile, Facebook is full of friends who bought a new house, went on a great vacation, bought a new car, etc. I spoke to a friend who spent thousands of dollars remodeling her already beautiful home. Other friends are looking at bigger houses, shinier cars, new toys, and on and on.
And it got to me. I admit it. I was sitting on our bed, which is where I work when someone else is watching Reagan. Our bed because our two-bedroom townhome doesn't offer any other place for me to work, except for our bedroom. On the other side of the bed was piles of laundry that needed to be folded and put away. Not the most conducive environment to be productive.
I started thinking about friends who lived in big houses with big yards, friends who were leaving for vacation this week, friends who had what I wanted and were doing what I wanted to do. And thus began Pity Party For One. I was sad. I was a bit miffed. I was, dare I say, even a bit whiny about our current situation.
I can't shoulder all of the blame for my discontentment. We are flooded with reminders that we need to have more, do more, be more. No money for that new car? Finance it. Want to go on a lavish vacation? Put it on a credit card. We live in a society where we are expected to have the best of the best, even if we can't afford it. Debt is accepted as a normal way of life. We can take years to pay off a car, a piece of furniture, an appliance, a cruise -- with a hefty interest rate attached -- because that's a much more palatable solution than waiting for what we can afford.
That's not the way we choose to live, and we're happy with that choice. It's why we live in the two-bedroom townhome, why we have one vehicle between us that is 10 years old, and why we only buy what we can pay cash for.
But just because we choose to live that way doesn't mean I'm always happy about it. And on this particular day, my pitiful attitude was at an all-time high. I wanted this, and that, and a lot of things that weren't within my reach at this moment in time -- things that we thought were within our grasp until the domino effect of events this year.
Sometimes I shake my head in disbelief at myself.
I of all people should know how ridiculously blessed we are, just by looking at the world around us. When I visited India in 2010, I saw poverty that I never imagined actually existed. People living in the most unimaginable squalor. Generations living under one blue tarp. Parents choosing to feed their children one meager meal, while they went hungry.
I went to Guatemala many years ago, but I still remember visiting a large junkyard, which at that time housed over 500 families. Children, and most likely adults, who never smelled fresh air. Boys and girls who never felt what grass felt like between their toes, or drank a nice glass of cold, fresh, clean water.
According to GlobalIssues.com, approximately half of the world's population live on less than $2.50 a day, with 80% living in less than $10 a day. For those not wanting to do the math, that means that only 20% of the world's population live on more than $310 a month. Imagine trying to feed a family on that.
I can pay for medicine. My son can go to the doctor. He never goes hungry.. I can put a coat on if it's cold out, and get a drink of fresh water from my faucet when I'm thirsty.
I can walk outside and smell the flowers. I can call, e-mail, or text a friend when I want to talk. I can eat fresh fruit and vegetables. I can do so many things that people all over the world would consider an unattainable luxury..
I'm embarrassed that I got sucked into the mindset that advertisers make billions of dollars off of -- believing that what I already have (and can afford) isn't good enough. Shame on me.
I'm grateful. I'm grateful for a loving husband, a beautiful little boy, a house with a low mortgage, a truck that is paid for, and a pantry that is full and overflowing with more food than some people will ever see in their lifetime. I have a comfortable place to sleep, a life filled with laughter, memories that make me smile, and more blessings than I could ever count.
I have enough. More than enough. I'm already rich.
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