Where Social Media Went Wrong

I admit it. I like Facebook. A lot. I like that friends from high school (and a few teachers), friends through work, relatives who live 800 miles away, and the person who does a fantastic job of cutting my hair are all part of my social circle. I think it's great that they get to 'meet' my husband and my son and be part of my world, and vice versa, even if real life keeps us apart.

But.

I don't necessarily like every part of social media. And by social media, I primarily mean Facebook. Yes, I have Twitter and LinkedIn, because people who know more than me say I need them to stay connected. I'm sure they are right. But for now, other than an occasional glance, Facebook is about all I can handle. I'm working on that.

Anyway. There are a few things that are starting to irk me about the endless stream of social chatter that fills up my news feed. I used to have a lot more free time. I used to have 30 minutes to troll through people's pictures and updates and mundane details of their life. But now, my Facebook time is largely limited to Reagan's post-nap ritual of watching Thomas the Tank Engine or the Wiggles. A few minutes here and there is about all I get.

And because I don't have as much time, I find myself getting increasingly annoyed at some of the downsides of  Facebook friends sharing their life in short updates. More and more, I find myself going to the upper right corner of a profile to uncheck the 'following' button, so I don't see their updates in my news feed anymore.  That little step alone has saved me a ton of sanity.

Here's why: when I only have a few minutes of nothing time (and I can already recite almost verbatim every. single. Wiggles. song), I don't want to hear about the fight you had with your spouse, how disrespectful your kids are, why you hate your job, or what political/social group of people you abhor.

I just don't want to know.

I about hit a tipping point a couple months ago, when the Duck Dynasty drama blew up all over the internet. People on both sides spewed venom. In the span of about three minutes, sitting in a hotel room on the first night of what was supposed to be a relaxing vacation, I read horrendous, almost-unspeakable things some people wanted to do to Phil Robertson, and alternately, proud, vocal support of his beliefs, complete with Old Testament scriptures stating what an 'abomination' (their words, not mine) homosexuals were.

I'm not talking one or two people. I'm talking way too many people taking up way too much space on my newsfeed.

Really? Is this what we've become? People wanting someone dead because of an admittedly really stupid comment he made? People calling someone an abomination who will rot in hell?

Really?

Call me crazy, but I think if it wouldn't be said to someone's face, it shouldn't be said at all.

The great thing about the country we live in is that we're all entitled to our own beliefs. It's a freedom that, sadly, too many people will never experience in their lifetime. But with that freedom comes a responsibility -- a responsibility to be kind to people who disagree with you.

I have a hard time believing someone would go up to somebody else and tell them that they wish they would die, or that they were going to rot in hell. Believe what you want, but that doesn't mean that belief needs to be shared with the world.

I think Facebook is great for what I started off this rambling blog with -- sharing fun stories, family photos, perhaps a cute anecdote. But, I don't think it's the place for hostile speech.

Nor do I think it's the place for airing dirty laundry. I'm sorry your 'stupid husband' came home late again, and I'm sorry that your 'dumb boss' is making you work late and that your 'annoying kid' is driving you insane with their rebellion. I really am sorry. But, in all fairness, unless you and I talk in person on a regular basis, and you consider me a close confidant, that's not really my business.

I assume most people have the same amount of free time I have, which is not very much. So if I'm going to take up a few seconds of your time with a brief update of my life, I hope it leaves you happy. I hope it leaves you inspired. I hope it leaves you with a smile. Maybe a chuckle (my kid can be pretty funny).

I hope it puts you in a better mood, not worse. I hope I have somehow brightened your day. And if I haven't, well then you have my permission to take me out of your news feed. Because, chances are, if you've told me about your abysmal day, or who you hate, or why your life is terrible, I've already taken you out of mine.